The Clip Show (Ep. 921 & 922) & The Finale (Ep. 923 & 924)

The Clip show is exactly what it sounds like, an hour long show before the finale that showed clips of the previous 9 seasons. Obviously there is nothing to write about it, or an interesting quote to give to it. So, I'll just write about The Finale.

Jerry and George are given another shot at The Jerry Show and this time NBC is treating them right. They give them a private jet and tell Jerry that he can take it anywhere before coming out to LA to shoot the pilot for the show. He decides to take the whole gang to Paris and they all agree. On the plane, Kramer starts jumping up and down to get water from the beach out of his ear and ends up messing something up on the plane. They have to stop in Latham, Massachusetts and while the plane is getting fixed, the gang goes into town. While there they witness a carjacking of an overweight man and instead of helping, they make funny comments while Kramer videotapes.

They get arrested on a new law called the Good Samaritan Law and trying to get publicity and make an example out of them, the town of Latham pulls out all the stops. They call in people from the past 9 seasons to show that this was not an isolated event. The evidence piles up against the four of them and eventually the judge sentences them to one year in prison. While the show is ending with them in prison, they finish with Jerry and George having the same conversation that started the show ("The second button is the key button. It literally makes or breaks the shirt.")

Interesting quote: "I don't know how, or under what circumstances, the four of you found each other, but your callous indifference and utter disregard for everything that is good and decent has rocked the very foundation upon which our society is built." - Judge Art Vandalay

Grade: B+ (Lots of people didn't like this episode, but I still enjoy it. They just didn't like it because they weren't getting anymore new Seinfeld.)

Well....it's been fun.

Reasonable Risk

Some people have questioned mine and Kimberly's choice to go overseas right now.  Their argument is that it's not safe in the world and something might happen to us.  Rest assured that the Peace Corp would not send us anywhere that they didn't feel was safe for us to go.  We are not going into combat so therefore they are not sending us into warzone type environments.  The goal of the Peace Corp is to provide assistance in any way possible to developing nations, and we wouldn't be able to provide assistance if the foreign country was not stable enough.

Now none of this is to say that conditions will be great, but that's the point.  Peace Corp volunteers are expected to live at the level of most of the native people in their area.  This is done so that the volunteer completely integrates themself into the society.  It may be hard, but it is by no means unsafe.  This is something that Kim and I have been looking for, for quite some time.  We wanted an experience very unlike our life here in America, something to challenge us, and make us think outside our relatively cushy life here at home.

The Peace Corp is a risk, but as I stated in the title of this post, it's a Reasonable Risk.

The Puerto Rican Day Parade (Ep. 920)

The gang is coming back from a baseball game at Shea Stadium and run into a road block because of the Puerto Rican Day Parade.  They are stuck and all set out to do various things.  George wants to go see a movie so he can use a funny line he's thought of, but this gets ruined by a guy with a laser pointer.  Jerry wants to see the end of the baseball game since the Mets are making a comeback.  Kramer is just enjoying the festivities and Elaine is trying to find a quick way home so she can unwind for the day.

Interesting fact: This episode never made it into reruns because of the outrage by the Puerto Ricans because in the episode Kramer catches the Puerto Rican flag on fire and starts stepping on it to put the fire out.

Interesting quote:

"Blimp: The Hindenburg Story" - George

"How was it?" - Jerry

"I found it morose.  Why dwell on all those negative subjects?" - George

"Yeah.  They should make a movie about all the Hindenburg flights that did make it." - Jerry

Grade: B

The Maid (Ep. 919)

Jerry starts dating his maid and begins blurring the lines between dating and prostitution.  George is tired of his name and wants to be called T-Bone, but someone else at work takes it.  Later the coworkers start calling him Koko the monkey.  Kramer gets upset because his girlfriend moves downtown and out of the area code.  Elaine, upset that Kramer keeps sending faxes to her phone, changes her number, but gets the new area code also.

Interesting quote:

"Are you sure you don't have one [fax machine], because there's a lot of stuff in my apartment I've never seen." - Kramer

"Then maybe you have a fax machine." - Elaine

"You just blew my mind." - Kramer

Grade: B+

The Frogger (Ep. 918)

George wants to save a Frogger arcade game that he holds the high score on, but this involves a complicated move across a busy street.  Jerry dates a girl who finishes his sentences and he can't stand it.  Elaine accidently eats a cake in Peterman's refrigerator that he had bought at an auction...it was from King Edward VII in 1937.  Kramer gets crime scene tape from the police station, and also hears of a serial killer who's on the loose in the neighborhood.

Interesting quote: "She's a sentence finisher, it's like dating a Mad Libs." - Jerry

Grade: B-

*Just for the fun of it I found this free game of Frogger online in case you wanted to go back to your childhood when games just need a single joystick and an on/off button.

The Bookstore (Ep. 917)

George takes a book from the bookstore into the bathroom and is forced to buy it for $100.  He tries to return it at various locations, but it's been red flagged everywhere.  Jerry catches Leo stealing from the same bookstore and decides to teach him a lesson, not knowing that he has "priors" on his record.  Elaine gets wasted at the annual J. Peterman party and makes out with a coworker.  Kramer and Newman set out to start a rickshaw taxi business in New York City, but have troubles when a homeless man steals their rickshaw.

Interesting quote: 

"You went home with him?" - George

"Worse, we made out at the table like our plane was going down." - Elaine

Grade: B+ (very solidly funny episode)

*Also wanted to thank my friend Jace for my Grogger (Grammy for a Blogger)...I didn't even know I was nominated.

Showing the love of Christ

If you don't at least tear up at this, then it's possible you have no heart.  I was on the verge of tears while reading it and I'm here at work.  Truly an amazing thing when someone does what is right, even when it seems opposite of what we're expected to do.

http://sports.espn.go.com/espnmag/story?section=magazine&id=3789373

Just some thoughts...

• We still haven't received our invitation, but at least now we know what the hold up was and it's being taken care of...slowly.
• Just watched a movie called Winter Passing (it was just okay) and Will Ferrell played a musician in a former Christian rock band called Punching Pilate...just thought that was funny.
• Also watched Run, Fat Boy, Run and thought it was pretty funny.
• I did finally finish reading Le Miserables and I've never been more proud of myself for it.  It was definitely a worthwhile 1200-page book to read.
• Almost finished with Seinfeld, just 7 more episodes to go after a big weekend.
• We are packing up and getting rid of things right now and it looks like someone has robbed us of all of our possessions.  Just a recliner and TV in the living room, the microwave is sitting on the dryer, and we are using plastic ware utensils.
• Doing a series at church called Messy Little Christmas and it's really good.  Dave gave a very vivid description of the Roman soldiers killing the children in Matthew 2:16.  Bethlehem was just a small tight-knit village of 300 or so people.  Can you imagine what that must have been like?
• But through it all, we know God is in control; "Be still and know that I am God..." - Psalms 46:10a

The Burning (Ep. 916)

Elaine finds out that Puddy is religious and is upset because she thought he was more one-dimensional.  Jerry’s girlfriend has a secret having to do with a tractor that she hasn’t told him.  George tries to leave work meetings on a high note and ends up impressing his boss so much he gets all the work.  Kramer and Mickey perform diseases for Medical students and Kramer does so well with Gonorrhea he gets typecast.

Interesting quotes:

"So, is it a problem that I'm not religious?" - Elaine

"Not for me." - Puddy

"Why not?" - Elaine

"Well, I'm not the one going to hell." - Puddy

Grade: A- (One of my favorites of all-time)

The Wizard (Ep. 915)

Jerry gets his father a wizard organizer, but he just uses it as a tip calculator.  Elaine tries to figure out if her boyfriend is black or not.  Kramer’s coffee table book is optioned for a movie so he decides to retire to the Seinfeld’s condo.  Morty convinces him to run for Condo President, but it doesn’t go as well as planned when Kramer inadvertantly breaks a condo rule.  George lies by telling the Rosses that he bought a home in the Hamptons to avoid going to a function for the Susan Ross Foundation.

Interesting quote: "Kramer you can't live down here, this is where people come to die." - Jerry

Grade: B-

The Strongbox (Ep. 914)

Kramer gets a strongbox to protect his “valuables” and tries to find a place to hide the key.  He ends up hiding the key in the food dish of a neighbor’s parrot.  Jerry upsets the same neighbor because he doesn’t let him in when he forgot his key.  Elaine dates a homeless man and at first is okay with him being homeless, but then finds out he’s married too.  George’s girlfriend refuses to break up with him, so he starts dating another girl from work to try to make his current girlfriend mad, but it doesn't work.

Interesting quote: "Man's best friend...Jerry I want something like that on my tombstone." - Kramer

Grade: B

The Cartoon (Ep. 913)

Elaine draws a cartoon for The New Yorker, but is accused of ripping off the old Ziggy cartoons.  George dates a woman who looks eeriely like Jerry and everyone knows it.  Kramer because of problems of talking too much decides to take a vow of silence.  Jerry upsets Sally Weaver, Susan’s old college roommate, and she turns it into a one-woman Jerry hating show.

Interesting quote: "It's so great to see a show that's about something." - Newman

Grade: C

The Reverse Peephole (Ep. 912)

Elaine is shocked when she finds out that Puddy wears a “man-fur” and so at Joe Mayo’s party she tosses it out the window.  Kramer and Newman want to reverse the peepholes on their doors, but the landlord doesn’t like Newman so he threatens to throw him out.  George gets a massage chair for a friend delivered to his house, but likes it so much that he decides to keep it.  Jerry dumps his wallet for a European carry-all and gets it stolen from him on the street.

Interesting quote:

"And of course you find fur morally reprehensible." - Jerry

"Eh, anti-fur.  I mean who has the energy anymore.  This is more about hanging off the arm of an idiot." - Elaine

Grade: B+

Tyler Hansbrough

Last night Tyler Hansbrough became the all-time leading scorer in UNC basketball history.  Is he the greatest basketball player in UNC history?  People seem to think so, but I think they are too quick to judge.  Apparently they've forgotten about James Worthy, Sam Perkins, Phil Ford, and some guy named Michael.  I mean just because he's won awards and he's the teams leading scorer doesn't mean a whole lot...what's he done for the team?

JJ Reddick is the all-time leading scorer at Duke and in the ACC, but I wouldn't put him in the top 5 of greatest players at Duke and probably not the top 25 of greatest ACC players.  On that note, Hansbrough probably will break the ACC record this year.  Right now, JJ is 467 points ahead and Hansbrough has the chance to play 29 more games this year (20 regular season, 3 ACC Tourney, and 6 NCAA tourney).  That would mean he would only have to average about 16 points a game (heck the refs will give him 16 trips to the foul line a game!).

But I did want to say congrats to Tyler...he is a good player, and he does play hard, but I still can't stand to watch him play...and that's coming from a fan of basketball, not a Duke fan.

The Dealership (Ep. 911)

Jerry goes to the car dealership to get a new car since Puddy is getting him a good deal.  Elaine gets pretty annoyed with Puddy's constant high-fiving and decides to break up with him, but this means Jerry loses his deal.  George has a run-in with a mechanic who he believes stole a Twix bar from him.  Kramer takes a car for a test drive and ends up turning it into a joy ride with the salesman to see how far they can go without filling up.

Interesting quote: "My father had a car salesman buddy.  He was going to fix him up real nice.  Next thing I know I'm getting dropped off in a Le Car with a fabric sunroof.  All the kids are shouting at me, "Hey, Le George!  Bon jour, Le George!  Let's stuff Le George in Le Locker!" - George

Grade: C- (Kind of an annoying episode, but the line George delivered is one of my favorites)

The Price is EXACTLY Right!!

Imagine you're on The Price is Right and you are the first contestant on the Showcase.  You guess some crazy number that you're not quite sure about, but you stick with it anyway.  Then you find out that you're only $494 off the total...insane right?  Well, what would you do if the second contestant nailed his total down to the dollar?!?  That's exactly what happened on The Price is Right the other day for the first time since 1972.  The guy guessed $23,743...a nice round number, and was dead on!  Here's the clip...that's just ridiculous!

Man Guesses EXACT Price in Showcase Showdown! @ Yahoo! Video

The Strike (Ep. 910)

H&H Bagels calls to tell Kramer that the strike is off and he goes back to work.  Him and other employees have been on strike for 12 years to bring wages up to $5.35, but now that the minimum wage is up, the strike is off.  Elaine gives a fake number to a guy at a party and it causes all kinds of problems.  Jerry dates a girl who looks different in different light.

George gives Christmas gifts of donations to a fake organization to his coworkers and Mr. Kruger finds out.  Frank, at Kramer's insistance, starts celebrating Festivus again.  Festivus is a holiday created out of the frustration of the commercial and religious problems of Christmas.

Interesting quote: "A Festivus for the rest of us!" - Frank Costanza

Grade: A- (Such a great episode, one that so perfectly depicts the eccetricities of the Costanza family)

The Apology (Ep. 909)

Jerry discovers his girlfriend likes to walk around the apartment naked and he loves it.  That is, until she shows him bad naked...straining to open a jar of pickles.  Jason Stanky is going through AA and gets to step 9, making amends, but George is upset when he doesn't get his apology.  Elaine has issues with a coworker (again!) who is a germaphobe and especially doesn't want Elaine's germs, because of her promiscuity.

Kramer begins spending all of his time in the shower and even starts preparing meals in there after he installs an industrial powered garbage disposal.  Puddy reveals that he's a recovering germaphobe and goes back after finding out the meal he's eating was fixed by Kramer in his shower.

Interesting quote: 

"Hey, how do you make those radish roses?" - Kramer

"Insert a knife into the center and twist.  Then to make it bloom, soak it in water 30-40 minutes." - Jerry

"No problem there." - Kramer, while in his shower

Grade: C (Not one of my favorites, but Kramer making the food in his shower was one good part)

The Betrayal (Ep. 908)

This episode goes in reverse the entire time, from Elaine, Jerry, and George returning from a trip to India all the way to Jerry first moving into the apartment.  Elaine receives a belated invitation to Sue Ellen Mischke's wedding in India and decides to go just out of spite.  Many crazy things happen in the process including Elaine finding out she used to date the groom, George refusing to go to the bathroom the entire trip, and George finding out that his girlfriend and Jerry slept together.  Kramer tries to figure out why FDR (Franklin Delano Romanowski) wishes he would drop dead.

Interesting quote: 

"So, Elaine are you going to sleep with me or what?" - George

"George, I just got off a 23-hour plane ride.  I'm too tired to even vomit at the thought." - Elaine

Grade: A (One of my all-time favorites)

Home is...

where Google is.

View Larger Map

Just showing off Google maps newest streetview footage and giving a shoutout my family in Georgia.

The Slicer (Ep. 907)

George gets a new job with Kruger Industrial Smoothing because the boss is clueless.  While he's there he spots a photo on Kruger's desk with him (George) in it.  Upon Kramer's insistence he steals it to get his picture removed, but it doesn't work.  Jerry is dating a dermatologist who talks about saving lives and he calls her on this, but looks foolish when she tells him she deals with skin cancer.

Elaine's neighbor left her alarm on when she left town, so her and Kramer short circuit the apartment.  This is good until she finds out they had a cat and they cut off it's feeder.  Kramer buys an industrial meat slicer, which Elaine borrows to slide meat under her neighbors door to the cat.

Interesting quote: "You call yourself life saver, I call you Pimple-Popper, MD." - Jerry

Grade: B

The Merv Griffin Show (Ep. 906)

Kramer finds the old Merv Griffin Show set in a dumpster and hauls it home and sets it up in his apartment.  Pretty soon he's hosting his own talk show.  George hits a squirrel with his car and his girlfriend makes him stop and take it to the vet.  Pretty soon he's taking care of the squirrel at his house.  Jerry's girlfriend has an amazing collection of toys and he wants to play with them, but she doesn't want anyone to touch them.  Elaine has issues (again) with a coworker who sidles up on people.

Interesting quote: "Wait a minute.  So you're saying you drugged a woman so you could take advantage of her toys?" - Kramer, about Jerry getting his girlfriend drunk to play with her toys

Grade: B+ (for Jerry and Kramer) C- (for Elaine and George)

Items we'll need...

Recently, some family, friends, and friends that are like family have been asking what Kimberly and I are going to need for our trip and if they can help. The good news is we won't be taking that much so there's not really much to get, plus we've already gotten most of what we need, but there are still a few items left.

The difficult thing is people like to actually get items for you instead of just giving you money (it's sometimes a little impersonal), but the items that we need are such that it would be better for us to pick them out ourselves. So Kimberly and I have compiled a list of items we still need with estimated cost of the items. We feel this is the best way so that people can see what it is we need instead of just handing us money for unknown items.

Radio ($30-60)
Hiking pack ($100)
Pashmina ($10-20)
Pajamas ($30)
Pillows ($20 each)
Trail Shoes ($60-80)
Laptop bag ($30)
Watches ($20 each)
Space Saver bags ($20)
Duct Tape
Ziploc bags

We'd like to thank everyone who is willing to help and for those who can't for just their love and support, we understand that these are hard times.

The Junk Mail (Ep. 905)

Kramer is getting irritated with getting Pottery Barn catalogs in the mail and decides he's going to attack it at the "choke point"...he's going to stop the mail. After being told he can't stop the mail he starts protesting outside the post office. Jerry is getting a vehicle from childhood friend Frankie Merman after doing a spot for his dealership, but is surprised when it's a van. He keeps it because Frankie gets easily upset and he doesn't want to hurt his feelings.

George is upset because his parents seem to be avoiding him, so he dates his cousin to get their attention. This doesn't work and it only upsets him more. Elaine dumps Puddy (again) when she discovers that she's found Mr. Right. Turns out Mr. Right is actually an obnoxious TV advertiser for an electronics store.

Interesting quote: "I don't think I want to meet the people who are in the market for a used van." - Jerry

Grade: C+

The Blood (Ep. 904)

Kramer worried that something might happen where he loses a lot of blood begins to hoard his blood in a blood bank, but when they charge him more he moves it to Newman's meat freezer.  Jerry's parents worry that he's getting out of shape and so they hire Izzy Mandelbaum to get him back into shape.  After an accident with an exacto knife, Jerry gets a transfusion of Kramer's blood.

George decides to combine his love for food and television with sex.  His current girlfriend is not too keen on the idea and dumps him because of it.  Elaine is upset to find out that her friend, Vivian, doesn't want her to babysit her son, so she babysits him anyway and ends up becoming the Godmother essentially.  When Elaine brings George over to the house, he finds that Vivian is a "lover" of food, television, and sex as well; and Elaine's problem is solved.

Interesting quote: "I find pastrami to be the most sensual of all the salted and cured meats.  Hungry?" - Vivian

Grade: B+ (Above average episode)

True Christmas Spirit

I was commenting to Kim last night about how A Charlie Brown Christmas and Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas are probably my two favorite Christmas movies of all time.  They are classics obviously (one from 1965 and the other from 1966), but more to the point they both represent what Christmas is truly about.

A Charlie Brown Christmas represents from a Christian standpoint of what Christmas is all about.  It's not about presents and a really nice Christmas tree and fancy decorations, but about God sending his only son as a sacrifice for us.  Sometimes we Christians accept too quickly what the World says Christmas is about and we get too caught up doing the wrong things.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas comes mainly from a secular standpoint, but the lesson is no less important.  The Grinch takes the presents and decorations and delicious food from the residents of Whoville because he thinks this is what Christmas is all about.  In the end they show him that's it's much more than that.  It's about loving one another and taking time out of your busy schedule to spend time with the ones who mean the most to you.

So this Christmas don't get so wrapped up (no pun intended) in buying presents for family that you forget to tell them that you love them.  And don't get so involved in doing routine Christmas things that you forget to thank God for the miracle that he sent to us.

Alabama football

I know the season isn't technically over and the game January 2nd against Utah does still count, but I wanted to go ahead and thank Alabama for a fantastic season of football.  Easily the best Alabama team I've seen since their championship team of '92, and possibly better.  You gave it your best shot against an amazing Florida team, but you came up short.  That's okay...just don't do it again next year.

On a side note, I would like to admonish the play of one particular player for Alabama and that's Javier Arenas.  I'll be the first to say that he's an amazingly talented player, but sometimes he just tries too hard to make a great play and it backfires.  A really smart player knows when to take a risk and when to play it safe.  He too often takes too many risks; such as catching a kickoff on the 4 yard line while tip-toeing the out of bounds line, or catching a punt on the 4 yard line with a defender bearing down on top of you.  Let's just hope that he matures a little between now and his senior year.

The Serenity Now (Ep. 903)

Frank is selling computers out of his garage and he's using George and Lloyd Braun to do it.  He's also using a special method called Serenity Now to calm his rage.  Jerry gets upset when his girlfriend insists he doesn't show his emotion enough.  Kramer fights the neighborhood kids while trying to experience Anytown, USA in front of his apartment.

Elaine is kissed by Mr. Lippman's son at his bar-mitzvah and now she's having to fight him, Mr. Lippman, the Priest, and Jerry who all want to marry her.  She finds out it's because she's got Schiksa, which seems to be a female version of Kavorka.

Interesting quote: "I'm open, there's just nothing in there." - Jerry

Grade: B (Pretty funny episode, but nothing really memorable)

The Voice (Ep. 902)

Jerry is fascinated by his girlfriend's bellybutton, so much so that he's given it a silly jovial voice.  This is great until he tells her and she tells him to drop the voice or she'll leave...he chooses the voice.  George is told by PlayNow that he's not welcome at the job anymore, but he decides that he's not leaving unless they fire him.

Jerry makes a bet that Elaine will continue to go back to Puddy and he continues to be right.  Kramer is tired of all his ideas going to waste so he gets an intern from NYU to do all of his work so that he can concentrate on his ideas...mainly a rubber bladder to hold oil in.  They test this at PlayNow by dropping it out of PlayNow's window, but it lands on Jerry's girlfriend.

Interesting quote: "Breaking up is like knocking over a coke machine.  You can't do it in one push, you have to rock it back and forth a few times.  Then it goes over." - Jerry

Grade: B+

The Butter Shave (Ep. 901)

George gets a job with a playground company called PlayNow, but they think he is handicapped thanks to a cane he carries to help him walk.  Jerry is upset because Bania is killing by following after him, eating up his laughs.  Later, for a big set he decides to throw the show to ruin Bania, but it backfires.  Kramer starts shaving with butter and likes the feel so much that he rubs it all over himself.  This is strange but okay until he bakes while laying out in the sun.

Elaine has taken a month long trip to Europe with Puddy and is ready to kill him so they break up in the cab on the way to the airport.  On the airplane, however, they get back together, but it doesn't last long and they break up again before the flight ends.  PlayNow eventually finds out that George isn't handicapped when they see him carrying a Rascal that they gave him.

Interesting quote: "Boy, a month in Europe with Elaine.  That guy's coming home in a body bag." - Kramer

Grade: A- (The scenes with Elaine and Puddy had me in tears)

The Summer of George (Ep. 822)

George realizes that he received three months pay as a severance from the Yankees and is determined to live up the summer.  Jerry starts dating a girl who has a male friend that she is very close with and it starts to make him suspicious.  He also later uses George to help him keep up with his duties as boyfriend.

Elaine once again has issues with a coworker, this time because the coworker won't swing her arms when she walks.  Kramer goes to the Tony's as a seat filler and manages to make it up on stage and collect an award.  The producers of the show tell him he can keep his award if he fires Racquel Welch.  This proves to be more difficult than he thought.

Interesting quote:

"What is so appealing to men about a catfight?" - Elaine

"Because men think that if women are grabbing and clawing at each other, there's a chance they might somehow kiss." - Jerry

Grade: B-

The Muffin Tops (Ep. 821)

George promises to watch a guys bag on the street, but when he doesn't return, George leaves and takes his bag.  He starts wearing the clothes and apparently looks touristy...so much so that a woman from the Visitors Bureau starts showing him around town.  Jerry accidently shaves his chest and now it's growing back thicker than ever.

Elaine goes into business with Mr. Lippman on a Muffin Top store, but then they have issues on what to do with the stumps.  In the end, Newman comes in to clean up their mess.  Kramer finds out that J. Peterman really did use his stories and now decides to create a Real Peterman Reality Tour, showing people all the famous spots where the real J. Peterman (Kramer) lived.

Interesting fact: The guy who Kramer was based on, Kenny Kramer, did his own Kramer reality tour...after which this story was modeled.

Interesting quote: "The last thing this guy's qualified to give a tour of is reality." - Jerry about Kramer's reality tour

Grade: C- (The muffin top story is really bad)

After this episode there are technically 25 episodes remaining, but considering 2 of those are a one hour clips show, it's really only 23.  I gotta pick up the pace.

The Millenium (Ep. 820)

Kramer and Newman are fighting over the plans of a New Years Eve party for 1999 (two years in advance).  Elaine has issues with a worker at Putomayo, a Mayan clothing store, and wants to put them out of business.  George gets offered a job as the head of scouting for the New York Mets, but since he still works for the Yankees they can't officially offer him the job, so he has to get fired.  He thinks this will be easy, but nothing seems to work.  Jerry keeps moving up and down his girlfriends speed dial and can't figure out why.

Interesting quote:

"I never thought I'd fail at failing." - George

"Oh come on now." - Jerry

"I can't do anything wrong." - George

"Nonsense, you do everything wrong." - Jerry

"Everything?" - George

"Everything!" - Jerry

"You really think so?" - George

"Absolutely, I have no confidence in you!" - Jerry

"Alright, I guess I just have to pick myself up, dust myself off, and throw myself right back down again." - George

"That's the spirit! You suck!" - Jerry

Grade: B+ (George "streaking" defaming The Babe's jersey and the World Series trophy and still not get fired...hilarious!)

Out of focus

Quit your worship charades

I can't stand your trivial religious games:

Monthly conferences, weekly Sabbaths, special meetings--

Meetings, meetings, meetings--I can't stand one more!

Meetings for this, meetings for that.  I hate them!

You've worn me out!

I'm sick of your religion, religion, religion,

while you go right on sinning.

When you put on your next prayer-performance,

I'll be looking the other way.

No matter how long or loud or often you pray,

I'll not be listening.

And do you know why?  Because you've been tearing

people to pieces, and your hands are bloody.

Go home and wash up.

Clean up your act.

Sweep your lives clean of your evildoings

so I don't have to look at them any longer.

Say no to wrong

Learn to do good.

Work for justice.

Help the down-and-out.

Stand up for the homeless.

Go to bat for the defenseless.

Isaiah 1:13-17 (The Message)

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These verses have been weighing pretty heavily on my mind lately.  We go to church and worship God, but all but ignore the people who are in need, which is one of the main things God asked us to do in the Bible.  Take care of those who can't take care of themselves.  It makes my worship feel fake to me and that's not cool...because if it's not authentic, then why am I doing it?  It's all a show!

Duke Football

Just wanted to write a special post thanking the Duke football team for a good season.  Easily the best season in a decade or so.  I know it was just 4 wins, but considering they only had 4 wins the previous 4 seasons, it's big improvement.  They only looked really bad in 2 games (Georgia Tech and Clemson) and should have won the Wake Forest game.  I only wish I could be here the next two years to see the continued improvement that I know David Cutcliff is going to bring to the program and fan base.  Thanks again!

The Yada Yada (Ep. 819)

George's girlfriend likes to use the phrase "yada yada" to sum up a conversation.  At first he likes this, but then she "yada yadas" over important things.  Kramer and Mickey can't decide which girl to pick on a double date, and Mickey ends up marrying the wrong woman.  Jerry is upset with Tim Whatley because he believes he converted to Judiasm just for the jokes.  Elaine ruins Beth and Arnie's chance at getting an adoption and in the process breaks them up.

Interesting quote:

"I met this lawyer, we went out to dinner, I had the lobster bisque, we went back to my place, yada yada, I never heard from him again." - Elaine

"But you "yada yadad" the best part." - George

"No I mentioned the bisque." - Elaine

Grade: B

The Nap (Ep. 818)

Jerry has a guy installing his new cabinets that needs help on every decision.  Kramer is fed up with trying to swim at the Health Club so he starts swimming in the East River, but he is bringing the polluted smell home with him.  

Elaine is dating a guy who is obsessed with back health and he buys her a matress.  At first she is upset because she thinks he's implying he wants to sleep with her so she gives it to Kramer, but then later wants it back.  When her boyfriend smells the East River on the matress he thinks Kramer is sleeping with Elaine.  George gets Jerry's guy to build him a place to sleep under his desk so he can take a nap at work, but it backfires when Steinbrenner camps out in the office to wait for George.

Interesting quote: "I love a good nap.  Sometimes it's the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning." - George

Grade: B-